Resist the temptation our world offers on what the "new mother" looks like. I am not promoting long dresses and cooking without electricity. I am promoting the essence of what is clear in God's definition of motherhood. Some would say it's old fashioned. Well, I suppose trying to recreate life in the 50's isn't going to cut it. Yet, there are some foundational principles that are worthy noting.
Don't buy into this "you deserve some time for you". Am I suggesting you don't ever have some restful times? No. I am suggesting that you don't live each day with that lens or you will resent the time and sacrifice that is involved with mothering. Decide now that it is hard work. Arm yourself with that mindset and you will be strengthened. Because whether you know it or not, you are already "wired" for the task. Within is a determination and resolute to do the task you were created for. Remember how you got through the pregnancy, labor and delivery of your child(ren)? Wow! We're quite the ladies, aren't we? Well, that same strength is still in you not only physically, but mentally and emotionally.
The culture would give you every way out to place your need first so you will be ready for the hard work. God has designed us to go to Him for all we need. He will give strength to the weary and grace for your difficult days.
Don't be surprised if you go through some months or years of working this out in your life. That is how we learn it. God isn't up there teaching us hard lessons the way we would compartmentalize our lives. Think of your life as a journey. You delight in the warm summer days that lead to a colorful autumn, but the winter comes and there may be some trodding through snow with the bitter wind on your face. But better days are ahead with the hope of spring and so we continue on.
Learn to bask in the small surprises along the day that make you smile. Even cold, winter days has lots of delightful surprises. But be ready and willing to face times of difficulty and allow God to help you through. Because getting your nails done or a shopping spree has its place and is temporary at best. But if you don't have the money for such things you will learn out of necessity the strength provided. And that is permanent.