Thursday, May 13, 2010

mom stuff

The reason this blog came about was because my heart aches for moms (and people in general) who work at doing all they know to do and oftentimes find disappointing results. I wanted to go beyond (read: be realistic) the nicey-nice books on family life and speak to those of us who's reality is not so blissful. I wanted to cut to the chase with setting ourselves up for disappointment. I wanted moms to know that even if things aren't looking so good, keep moving and don't despair. Don't assume that you aren't a good mom because you are dealing with difficulty or disappointment. 

Let's face it. We know that life is not perfect. Yet, some of the books out there seem to put it all in a nice package as if you just follow the to-do list or their example, you too can have a great family.

If you have been following me you may have come to realize that my faith is the bedrock of my life. We all have to build on something and what our world view is either flavors or taints everything. Essentially, I have responded to the Bible in such a way that I find it's absolute truth, howbeit unnerving at times, to be worth building on. Just as a house or bridge needs a firm foundation, the scriptures offer a foundation. In my response to the cross, I have taken seriously my faith regarding to how God has "wired us". In other words, I can "right click" all I want on this Apple laptop and it ain't going to work like my Microsoft PC did! And if we would look at the scriptures, which are a "lamp to our feet", we will find that it keeps us in working order, the way that the Creator had intended.

I am not one to throw a scripture at everything. That serves no purpose in my mind than to set people up to return to what the Old Testament could not do. The keeping of the Law is not first and foremost. What is first and foremost is knowing that a God who loves us so dearly, sent His Son to be the rescuer of Mankind from their sin. Our personal response to that is necessary. God loves us and wants us to love Him back... with all our heart, soul, and strength. And the scriptures tell us that He is very present in our lives in ways we cannot understand. All I know is that I for one have felt His comfort during sorrowful times, Him somehow strengthening me when I couldn't go on, His hope when I didn't want to go on, and His guidance in thinking life through.

That said, I have complete confidence in God's leading in an individual's life. He tells us in the Gospels that He knows the number of hairs on our head. That tells me He is very aware of every aspect of our lives. Will you trust Him? 

Lots of books and classes and models of how it's done is even within Christian circles. I am thankful for it. We don't have to succumb to current trends and new-fangled ways of parenting (only to find the turn-over is something like 4.5 years until someone comes along with a "better" way). Yet, we must also be careful not to follow Christian trends, either. We are not immune to this. People are people.

We also cannot and should not recreate life in the 50's as if that somehow offers a more Godly life. True, it was a more righteous world, but trying to bring your child(ren) up in that atmosphere could be very isolating in my opinion. Then again, if God leads you it's none of my business!

We must be relevant. And since life today offers a buffet of ways to do things, even in our churches, we have to keep close as possible to the essence of the scriptures, but the practical application may look different between individuals and families. And that is okay.

Don't model yourself after another mom. Don't try to recreate something another family is doing if it doesn't fit. Yes, we can learn from each other but don't be afraid to pave your own way. God is not limited and we certainly cannot box Him in. While we build on His methods, we can be creative. Religion is stifling. God is not. Look outside right now and just see all the wonderful shades of spring green and how many shades of yellow can there be? All announcing that God is real and alive! Do you ever tire of looking up at the billions of stars or gazing at an autumn moon? Or trying to count the number of points on a snowflake to see if there really are six sides? God loves color and shapes and variety. And your children, your family is going to be part of that variety!

Let it happen.

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